Lockdown Curfew:- A Death Sentence of Kiboko

Mungu alu, COVID-19 dii is real, your experience might not be my experience but the truth remains, it's Real. We are facing a horrible disease declared by WHO as a pandemic. Anyway, we didn't care what the pandemic is all about, until it hit us hard, all we know was our life must continues normally. Many countries implemented lockdowns and curfews to curb the spread of the virus and so was Uganda - Wealthy lockdown - yes if you know.

After two days of not testing my sweet drinks and delicious meals, I had to establish connections with bar attendants of my favorite joints, we had our way of knocking the gate to allow us in. Drinking Uganda Waragi is a dream come true, it's like this surprise visit at your ghetto by this angelic girl you had crush on for the past 18 years since you were born, you even saw her when you were still in the womb. It's as sweet as the free food you eat at your ex crush's girlfriend wedding - the girl who ended up marrying an ugly broke boy - the guy who used to beat me everyday in primary school for 6 years and grabbing everything from me including my girlfriends. You know, you are not in the wedding to actually celebrate with them but to ensure that she actually gets married to the son of the daemon who made my life hard so that you can monitor their life properly.

Forget the sh*t, Uganda Waragi is so sweet, its as sweet as the sound made by  your throat swallowing the best piece of cake and the quenching glass of wine at your wedding in front of a mammoth crowd who are all salivating and wishing to be the ones eating and drinking it, actually some are not here with that hope to taste but are the monitoring spirits. The sweetness of Uganda Waragi is unmatched, Corona recently even fears the smell. BTW, UG is on high demand, some non drunkards are all sneaking out to drink it - Drunkards just don't die faaaaa, they die a diplomatic death sipping the best liquor unfortunately after drinking for 10 years they look like a forgotten Margot.

These are the things which made us suffer during lockdown, but it was worth suffering and dying for. Ova how many days was our lockdown? I don't know anyway. I swear the old man hated us the drunkards, he believes we are a nonsense to the community and can easily spread the virus, henceforth he totally shut off bars, disco's, night clubs and even shows. Oh my poor artist are now beggars in the streets. Anyway, what they forget is that, the wisest men in the world are the drunkards, you can never defeat a drunkard in anything, we are untouchable, we can lie of our lives as well as assuming living in a lavish lifestyle. When you are the yeast hits you, it's like a marungi eater who can construct a store house with just UgX 1,000/= they did it successful here in Arua, Ociba coast marungi center in 1997 when my cousin ate 10 kgs of mira in one day, yeah, we still waiting for the foundation till today.

During the lockdown, I got a Million Shilling gig to supply roasted stones to Congo, its a kinda rear stone only diehards can supply, its fermented in a septic tank, roasted under the sun and dried water. You be there thinking of roasted stones - idiot - its the Uganda Waragi in me writing, i have been hit by the yeast already. ANyway, i got my free money after doing the work perfectly. You know in Uganda we celebrate, celebrate life, celebrate, celebrate, party, celebrate thats why we got a trendy song titled party something. Poverty is nothing here when it comes to celebrations, the poor drink the most and you even sometimes hire them to celebrate the death of your enemies, I know some Ugandans are waiting to celebrate my death for writing about their tactics of survival during Corona Lockdown.

You all know we live in a depleted country, when they see you out during curfew hours, you are the opposition who deserves OKoTO (Fist Knock on the Head), these guys truly know their job, they can knock you on your head so hard that, it will take you to Juba airport to look for the President, you shake hands with Salva kir and straight to the Khartoum prison where Bashir is been kept and ask him, "did the women cane you?" Then you wake up to your normal sense that your head had been just knocked by a military guy implementing a night curfew around Arua Hill slopping towards Sabiya.

We went drinking our favorite Uganda Waragi as well as enjoying the best delicious pork from a Lockdown hide out in town to celebrate the hard work. What is the essence of working hard, sweating everyday, hurting yourself, going through stress and getting all the abuses for been the best or the worst without enjoying the sweat of your pain? It's our life, not even the lockdown or curfew could stop us from looking for what to drink and eat from our favorite joints. Little did we know we had been betrayed by some born again who used to come sit next to us waiting to enjoy our pork.

The sweet moment was short lived when a hard kiboko landed on our table. We could not tell which direction they came from or which route they used access the hide out, we all thought it was a dream but the swiiiiiiiii sound of the kiboko (a term for whip; strip of hippo hide ) came crushing like the helicopter owned by Uganda Police, I don't know, I have never even touched one or seen one since a black soldier nearly squeezed my blood out like a sponge for just touching the president's red carpet in 1996 at some boma ground in Uganda. I don't want to know how a crushing helicopter looks like, this things are bad.

I forgot that I exist when the kiboko crush landed on my back, i jumped out on the main road, I forgot my name, my village, my church, everything forgotten and I shouted in a dead mans voice "am married with 100 wives and 360 children don't kill me" the tall fat bellied soldier replied "What are you saying?" I shouted "Yaaaaaaaaaaaa man - mamaaaaaa, I died when I was 5 years, you're beating a ghost" I wish you watched the video of the scene recorded by God that day  showing all the tears rolling down my eyes like the Miriadoa Water Falls in Maracha, I saw the water in my body dry out as it the tears kept flowing to the tarmac on avenue road.

Photo Source: Daily Monitor - Security forces conduct an operation in Kalerwe, Kampala

As I resurrected from the dream of the thunderous kiboko, another landed on my neck, it wrapped up around my neck in 10 microseconds. I saw my breath disappear when the merciless guy pull back the strip and it threw me down crushing exactly like the swiiiiiiiiiii boooooooom police helicopter. I knocked my head hard on the hard Chinese CICO tarmac, before I realized i had fallen, i was lost under the kangaroo shoe of five soldiers which landed on my head and I don't know which other parts were stepped on but I couldn't feel my in between legs due to the pain which flow from my toes to the head. A heavy Mike Tyson punch landed on my lower belly - I whispered to Holyfield "How did you take out Mike?" instead the angel of death was there saying "Die die die now" mtcweeee idiot, rot in hell.

When i thought it was over, an Ivory baton landed on my knees, before i got to my feet. It swept me face down with more than 7 heavy shoes landing on my back this time around, seems someone jumped with both legs on my back. O my sweet champion Uganda Waragi led me to hell, but it resurrected the hero in me, I shouted "STOP" before, I finished saying stop, it had already risen me up on my feet. I grabbed about five soldiers pushed them under the police van. this video was recorded by my eyes, i can play the evidence to you but before i could punch the other man behind me, My UG Waragi said, "Run for your life" I ran as fast as Inzikuru Dorcas ran during the Common Wealth games.

I was unmatched, even Kiwa or Shida are still can't match to my running. we all know Proscovia can jump but i really did a jump that propelled me to sprint like an ostrich running after a mad man who had taken its eggs. I ran until they ran me over with a military tank, its a real battle out here during lockdown curfew, only the fit and brave can survive the battle. Its not just a battle, its a death sentence of kiboko, not to kill you but just to teach you to be a law abiding citizen. As I write this, it's my spirit writing from hell for not respecting and obeying the laws of the country.

Let me end my imaginations here, nothing in this post is real - let me hear you talk out there that i was beaten. You will get the COVID-19 in my head with the next write up. Don't forget to leave a COMMENT on the Comment Section.

#COVID-19isReal

#Keep Safe

#Wear Mask, Keep Social Distance, Stay Home if you have Nothing to do in Public

Follow me on Social Media.

 Facebook 

Instagram

Twitter